(no subject)

[pearwaldorf]

I got into the Rotterdam study abroad program. The problem is because I applied so late, I'm waitlisted pending people's return of their acceptance contracts. The professor in charge of the program is trying to figure out what he can do to get me in, but I'm not hopeful. He was hoping I would apply earlier, but figured it was a money issue or sommat that was preventing me from doing so. I've had the money lined up for weeks, I've just been lazy and unmotivated. The part that just makes me want to curl up into a ball is that he said he would send me an email confirming my place on the waitlist, but it in no way affects how qualified he thinks I am for the program. So I might have lost the chance to go because I didn't want to get my shit together, and makes me feel like a complete failure as a student and a person.